REBUILDING THE LIFE I LOVE #3 (post 10)

October, 7.5 months post stroke and surgery and to be honest I am amazed and so grateful with my recovery to date. By simply looking at me, I don’t believe anyone would be able to tell the journey I have been on and recognise the challenges I am faced with daily. I have been fortunate that if I wear my hair pulled back my scar/shaved spot on my head is covered (a few spikey bits appear out of place every now and again as my hair grows back but this has always been the least of my worries). My scar is no longer visible however it is very sensitive to touch and you can feel indentation where the surgery occurred.

As mentioned in my last blog I was discharged from my physiotherapy program at the end of August and have been focusing on re-building my strength and fitness on my own. Although I’m not up to running long distance just yet my gym routine is back on track to what it looked like pre-stroke and I am using heavier weights than ever before. I have also incorporated 2 gym classes into my weekly routine, one with my sister and one with Ryan which I find very motivating and makes training even more enjoyable. Like for anyone, some days are much harder than others. Depending on many circumstances, some days my body will move freely and other days it will ache all over. For someone who has always felt in-tune with my body, these days I truly ‘listen’ to my body as I know an injury or burning out would have detrimental effects on my recovery and progress and there’s no going backwards for me, only forwards.

From barely being able to walk and having no strength in the right side of my body when I first left hospital to now lifting heavier weights in the gym and being able to run up to 4kms is honestly just incredible (without tooting my own horn). Just like my other blogs I have written this for my own personal benefit as I have found expressive writing to be a great way to reflect and accept the negatives but to also acknowledge and celebrate the positives be that big or small. I have found this to be an incredible tool for building and maintaining a positive mind set through this journey and have been overwhelmed by the number of people who have reached out to express how reading along has touched them in many ways and altered peoples perspective.

So, from the outside apart from what myself and my family refer to as my ‘spikes’ where my hair has grown back remarkably quick, I look ‘normal’, but it’s on the inside that I am reminded every day of the stroke. My right foot still feels like a dull pins and needles sensation that travels up my entire leg. This sensation never goes completely however some days are a lot more intense and uncomfortable than others, especially if I’m tired. My right leg up to my hip constantly feels heavy and on the rare occasion it might catch the floor while I’m walking. When lifting with my right arm, particularly above my head I need to consciously think about the movements and focus on my control otherwise it really wobbles.

Determining where my foot/leg position is when in ‘space’ is still challenging and something I continue to work on daily. Box jumps are an exercise I have incorporated into my routine and although the concentration that these entail almost gives me a headache, I have found it to be a great way to focus on my foot positioning. Something else that I embrace these days now is ‘rest days’. Pre-stroke I would do some sort of training 6 days a week however now my body fatigues quickly and I have found huge improvements in my energy levels and strength technique when I have a days break in-between my training days.

After a recent trip to Noosa I noticed a real struggle with summer footwear which was unfortunate as I had only packed sandals, thongs and runners (runners and skirts isn’t really the best look) and I was forever losing my footwear from my right foot mid walk. On a positive note during our stay I also noticed a real improvement in the way I can now handle a staircase, I’m certainly not running up and down them but at a slow pace I was able to tackle the stairs without hanging on.

Whilst having a relaxation massage in Noosa I became aware of something I hadn’t noticed for a long time which was the lack of sensation that extended over the entirety of my right-side of my body. Physiotherapy had a major focus on my leg and a small focus on the mobility and strength of my right arm however I hadn’t ever really noticed the severity through my back. It felt like two different types of pressure were being applied to me. The left side of my body felt like a moderately firm massage however the right-side felt like a soft touch. At this point I’m not sure if there is anything, I can do to help improve the overall sensation however it is something I will be looking into.

Driving barefoot has been an absolute game changer for me. I noticed that my shoe was interfering with the sensation between my foot and the peddles so I decided to try barefoot one day and I haven’t looked back. I have driven up to half an hour away from home in moderate traffic and I’m feeling more confident every day. Occasionally my foot will still get ‘lost in space’ but mainly when moving my foot from the brake to the accelerator and I think this is because the accelerator pedal in significantly smaller than the brake. Recently I drove my sisters car and it was like starting all over again as each car is so different to drive. A couple of weeks ago I drove a short distance home quite confidently in the dark. Night-time driving is something I do need to focus more attention on however with two young children it’s not often I am out after dark these days, #mumlife.

Although this can be a controversial topic, about 12 weeks ago I started to incorporate regular chiropractic into my recovery routine. I strongly believe that this has helped to open gateways within my nervous system allowing it to work better and therefore helping my entire body to work better. Due to several reasons including stress and most likely low body weight after surgery my menstrual cycle ceased. 2 days after my initial chiropractic session my cycle returned, I felt less stressed and a muscle pain I had in my upper back to the right of my spine disappeared. Dr. Melanie Chiropractor, you are wonderful!

14th October was Allied Health Practitioner Day which celebrated the work that Allied Health professionals do every day but also recognised the people (like me) that they work with. My team that consisted of a physiotherapist and physiologist reached out to me and asked if I would participate in a patient story poster as in their words ‘’We both think that your story is one that can really show people (and therapists) to think about people as a ‘person’ and not just a ‘diagnosis’.” I was deeply touched by their email and appreciate they have been reading along with my journey.

We don’t know what life holds for us but I am a strong believer in the following quotes ‘life is what you make it’ and ‘everything happens for a reason’. I have chosen to grow from this experience, to value the smaller things in life for example being up before the sun and watching it rise to having the ability to go to the toilet unassisted. Although I don’t let this define me, I am a stroke survivor and thriver and this has changed my perspective on life.

Gym session with hubby

Retrieving my lost footwear in Noosa